AI reshapes dating platforms, but singles set clear limits on emotional automation

Findings from “The singles dating survey”, released by Lunch Actually Group, reveal a nuanced attitude towards AI in dating. Singles broadly accept automation as a tool for efficiency, safety and scale, but are resistant to its role in emotional judgement or relationship decision-making.

According to the survey, 61% of respondents believe an AI companion could never replace the emotional depth of a human relationship, despite the growing presence of AI-generated profiles, chatbots and virtual companionship features on dating platforms.

“Efficiency matters, but authenticity matters more,” said Violet Lim, co-founder and CEO of Lunch Actually Group. “Singles are willing to use technology to reduce friction - not to replace emotional judgment. Platforms that over-automate risk eroding trust rather than improving outcomes.”

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Awareness outpaces adoption

The findings underscore a critical tension: AI is increasingly central to operational performance, yet its role must be carefully defined to avoid undermining user trust. While awareness of AI-enabled dating tools is widespread, actual usage remains limited. The survey found that 68% of singles have never used AI tools such as chatbots or profile optimisers as part of their dating journey.

That gap, however, does not signal outright rejection. About 42% of respondents said they would be open to dating someone who used AI assistance, while another 36% remained undecided. The divide between awareness and adoption points to an opportunity for hybrid models - where technology supports better decision-making without replacing human agency.

“The data suggests users are not rejecting AI outright,” Lim said. “They are selective. They want technology that supports better choices, not shortcuts emotional processes.”

For brands operating in the dating economy, this suggests that product adoption may hinge less on novelty and more on how clearly AI’s role is communicated - and constrained.

Trust lives in safety, not feelings

Where singles do trust AI is in operational and risk-related functions. Survey responses indicate that confidence in AI is strongest when it comes to improving efficiency and reducing harm, rather than shaping emotional outcomes.

While 46% of singles said they were unsure whether AI could meaningfully improve dating safety, respondents were clear about what would encourage continued use of dating platforms: better match quality (58%), verified profiles (58%), and safer dating experiences (48%).

“These are no longer differentiators - they are baseline expectations,” Lim said. “Singles are signaling that technology should reduce risk and improve efficiency, but not substitute for human connection.”

App fatigue sets in

The survey also points to mounting fatigue with app-led dating models. Among respondents who had previously used dating apps, 43% said they had reduced their usage or stopped altogether, citing persistent issues such as fake profiles (66%), ghosting (49%), and a lack of genuine emotional connection (47%). The findings suggest that adding more features alone may do little to address declining engagement or user churn.

At the same time, offline formats are regaining traction. More than 51% of respondents said in-person dating events feel more genuine than app-based or AI-assisted interactions, highlighting renewed commercial potential for platforms that blend technology with human-led matchmaking, curation and accountability.

Founded in 2004, Lunch Actually Group is an Asian matchmaking company that combines human expertise with technology to support long-term relationships across Singapore, Malaysia, Thailand, Hong Kong and Indonesia.

Against this broader industry backdrop, the company has taken a selective approach to AI adoption, using it internally to improve efficiency and matching outcomes while keeping human judgement central to relationship success. The company applies AI to assist with initial match filtering and facilitation logistics, as well as to analyse historical matching data to identify factors linked to successful outcomes.

According to Lunch Actually Group, these efforts have increased both the number of dates facilitated and successful matches, while freeing matchmakers to focus on higher-value work such as client conversations, coaching and post-date feedback.

“AI helps us surface patterns and operate at scale,” Lim said. “But the final matching decisions remain human-led. Technology supports insight - it doesn’t replace judgment.”

The company has deliberately chosen not to automate emotional assessment, coaching or decision-making. “The goal isn’t to replace matchmakers,” Lim added. “It’s to free them up. We deliberately draw the line where automation would dilute insight, empathy, or accountability.”

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